Lauren et le pays des mille collines: HIT OR SHIT

Taking a page out of the Xaverian Weekly’s book (or paper, if you will – this is my alma mater university’s student newspaper) I will simplify this week’s blog post into a list as I am busy working on another writing piece already..

Lost camera – SHIT! Thank God I took the gorilla pictures and videos off of there beforehand! At the bottom are a few of the last pictures from my camera. RIP Nikon CoolPix, wherever you are..

Bringing a purse to a bar with no cover charge – SHIT! People just come to that bar to ambush unsuspecting people such as myself. idiot Good thing I don’t have much money and so TWO attempts and a successful one later, they only stole 10 bucks.

Rwandese friends who stand up for you after said stealing attempts and get the culprits kicked out – HIT! Rwandese don’t want you to think their country is ridden with thieves so they will put a stop to this whenever they can.

Whitewater opening – SHIT! Just because I am jealous and wish I was there…

Paperwork for Visa – SHIT! Who would’ve thought you needed 23498 notarized documents just to declare that you are ‘working’ in Rwanda, then to find out that to obtain the visa you have to pay the maximum price which is for people who are actually getting a salary in Rwanda. All of this even though you are working for FREE in Rwanda?

No running water for 11 days – SHIT! You’d think $300/month of rent would come with this somewhat necessary utility. Bucket showers for life.

Chapatti omelet combo – HIT! Almost like KFC’s ‘Double Downer’ in that this was pretty much a chapatti sandwich with onion omelets as the ‘bread’

Languages – HIT! While it’s fun being able to speak English very fast in order to trick your non-English speaking friends, it’s even better doing it by speaking in pig Latin.

Nyama Choma – HIT! Traditional Ugandan dish that is just a huge slab of viande de chevre (goat meat) in the form of either the entire goats’ limb or ribs.

Hashing –HIT! Not sure how else I would get to run through the Rwandese countryside.

Nature calling in the middle of Hashing as a result of eating Nyama Choma – SHIT! Obviously. Try finding somewhere private in the bush in the most densely populated country in the world, even if you are ‘out in the country’.

Eating with your hands – HIT! This is the norm when you’re eating meat dishes in Rwanda.

Whistling – SHIT! Women who whistle here are seen as uneducated, so NO ONE does it. Except me. I can’t help it when Nicki Minaj gets in my head and just won't get out.

Eating while walking – SHIT! Also unacceptable in Rwanda. Must be sitting.

Canadian girls movie night – HIT! Hadn’t seen that much junk food in ages. Mr Potato (wanna-be pringles) treated us very, very well.

Two hour protestant church service all in Kinyarwanda – HIT (questionable)! Even though the words I could pick out consisted of Hallelujah, harico (which means however), and imana (God),the experience was pretty cool for the first half hour of singing and dancing… which was followed by a full hour of preaching. Needless to say I told my friend that was most likely the first and last time I’d go with him to church…

Nakumatt – HIT! The Walmart of East Africa, open 24 hours a day.

The price of Quality Street caramels at Nakumatt – SHIT! 13,800 FRw = almost $30..

The weather – HIT! Consistently above 20 degrees, I am currently working on my freckle tan outside of my house.

Lack of snow in Africa – SHIT!

Christmas spirit in Rwanda – SHIT! See previous line. I think there is a direct link between the two for me. However, Rwanda is trying. There are Christmas lights in the trees around the traffic circles, and Nakumatt is selling decorations for ungodly prices like $30 for a string of garland.. think we’ll have to skip the Christmas tree this year.

Christmas music – HIT! I couldn’t wait until December 1^st. This radio website was calling my name.

Thinking about the food from home during Christmas and torturing myself by looking at marthastewart.com’s list of appetizers and Christmas baking – SHIT!

Invigilating exams – SHIT! We aren’t allowed read or do anything while we do this like our profs could at home.

Marking exams – SHIT! Clearly.

5 DAYS UNTIL X RING! – HIT!

Not having my X Ring on the first anniversary of this glorious event – SHIT!

Thinking about the candy-cane martinis and food consumption at Wighland last year during this glorious event – SHIT! Mmmmm finger food and candy canes mixed with alcohol…so unattainable.

Rwandese fabrics and tailors who will make whatever you want for less than $30 – HIT!

Playing football with men who think women in general don’t know how to play, especially white women – HIT! They were surprised I could even run let alone kick the ball with my right AND left foot…

And now for some pictures: